“But the Eyes of the Lord

are watching over those

who fear Him, who rely upon

His Steady Love. Only He can

help us; He Protects us like

a Shield.”

(Psalms 33:18, 20b LAB)

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“The Shield Around Me“

by Debbie Allen

Over seven years ago now, God called me into an unexpected and unwanted journey, involving my right eye.  April 16, 2017, marked the day the light went out of that eye, due to a torn and separated retina. Darkness rushed into the place where I’d known only light all of my life. No rhyme… no reason…no warning. I woke up one morning and was helpless to change my circumstances on my own.   The only thing I could see were the Fingerprints of God, all over an unexpected season in my life.  And if I’m honest…every day up until now.

So often in life, I’ve found that God uses the darkness we encounter in our life’s journey to birth something greater in His children. My eye was no exception. As one circumstance led to another, I was being pointed by God, to a Retina Specialist/Surgeon who believed she could put light back into my eye.   Two days after meeting her, she performed major surgery on my eye; restoring the light inside of it…and sending me down a new pathway in my life; one I would never have chosen for myself. A pathway, that only God knew would bring Him more Glory than my former way of seeing things ever could have.

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“God uses the darkness we encounter in our life’s journey

to birth something greater in His children.”

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Once the inside of your eye unravels, even after being repaired, the chances of it unraveling again remain high. This in mind, Dr. Dee felt it necessary to perform an additional major surgery on my eye only a month later; just to be on the safe side.  She placed what is known as a buckle, or a shield, around the entire outside of my eyeball. This shield holds my retina firmly in place.  It’s my added protection against having to live in darkness again.  It helps to keep everything from coming apart…including me. 

Spiritually, I believe that the shield around my eye also speaks of an even Greater Shield surrounding my entire life. The physical shield protecting my eye, is my ever-present daily reminder to my heart of the Lord…Whose Everlasting Arms are wrapped tight around me…holding me, keeping me from coming apart at the seams even when things look their darkest. Through all the wavering high and low pressures continuously plaguing my eye; and the rigorous mountains and valleys I’ve walked through in my life over these last seven years now; only once did the enemy’s intrusive whispers cause me to question or doubt the strength of the physical shield placed around my eye…or the trustworthiness of my Faithful God. God continues to tell me over and over again in His Word: “I am your Protecting Shield.” (Deuteronomy 33:27a NLT). I believe this truth with all my heart. Even so…one day recently, something changed inside my eye again.

A seven- year struggle to regulate high pressure in my eye suddenly reversed. Now the pressure in my right eye was so low it was no longer measurable. No pressure in my eye; brought with it, not darkness, but a dusk-level of dim light to try and see my world through. On top of this, Dr. Dee reversed a decision that she’d “…done every surgery on my eye that she could do.” Unable to visibly detect what was wrong with my eye; she now stood in front of me saying, “I’m going to have to do exploratory surgery on your eye.”  She speculated that “the shield around my eye was broken, might need to be removed, or had a hole in it, and was pressing down into the white part of my eye causing an abrasion, leakage of fluid, and infection.”  Watching me squirm in my chair at the thought of what just transpired, Dr. Dee put a reassuring hand on my shoulder. She looked me square in the eye, and told me straightforward, “This is something new with your eye…we are on a new journey now!”  Leaving the exam room that day, Dr. Dee’s last words still echoed in my thoughts.  Though she intended that little word ‘we’ as a reference to ‘her and I’…deep inside of me I already knew that it was God who was telling my heart personally that He and I… ‘We’ are on a New Journey now!”

I felt a little like the ancient Israelites, who had only a moment’s notice to pack-up all their things to journey across the desert whenever they saw God (in the form of a Pillar of Cloud) moving ahead of them; leading them towards their next unknown destination. Two days later, I packed-up all my things and followed God’s lead to the Surgical Center for another major eye surgery. Like the Israelites, I’d learned one step at a time, that I could trust God fully with my life…even when being led to unknown places.

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“Let the dawning day bring me revelation of Your Tender, Unfailing Love.”

(Psalms 143:8 TPT)

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The day of surgery, my husband and I left the house just as the sun was coming up.  In the first light of the day, I felt God reminding me of His Presence going before me; especially when we passed a giant billboard beside the highway, displaying a giant JESUS all across it. My heart had to smile! For the verse I read in my Bible before we even left the house was this:

“Let the dawning day bring me revelation of Your Tender, Unfailing Love” (Psalms 143:8).

Just an accident? Maybe a coincidence? Not a chance!  When I was being prepped for surgery, the nurse who was assigned to me, entered the room like warm sunshine. Brimming from ear to ear, she introduced herself as being “the one who would be taking good care of me’, and assured me, ‘I was in good hands.’ But when she revealed to me that her name was, ‘Dawn,’ and told me “I’ll be praying for you!” as they wheeled me out for surgery…I knew God was just showing me once more, that He really was Present and going before me in this new journey. By the light of two ‘Dawns’ I encountered in this one morning…I believe my God was actively revealing ‘His Tender, Unfailing Love’ to my heart, in His Own undeniable and miraculous ways!

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“As we trust, we rejoice with an uncontained joy flowing from YAHWEH!”

(Psalm 33:21 TPT)

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On this side of another major surgery again, I can tell you that Dr. Dee did find a small tear in the white part of my eye and successfully repaired it.  The hole was on the backside of my eye just beyond the shield…so I emerged from the surgery with my eye’s shield still fully intact!  Why is that so important to me?  Over the past seven years, that shield has become for my heart, a tangible reminder of God’s Presence and Protection in my life.  Though it can’t be seen when you look at me, I know it’s a very real presence inside of me, and it surrounds my eye, securely holding things together that might otherwise fall apart.

On a grander scale, life itself is a lot like that unpredictable, right eye of mine. At any given moment it has the potential of coming apart at the seams when we least expect it.  Suddenly, and without warning, our whole life can shift and fall apart. A health crisis, strained relationships, an unexpected death, to mental and emotional trauma or anxiety and depression…and the list goes on.  Yes, there are doctors, counselors, pastors; and even friends and family available to us that can help ‘put’ us back together.  But much like my eye after the first surgery; the risk of falling apart again remains high unless something more permanent is done.  Humanity’s hands are capable of working small miracles when it comes to ‘putting us back together’, but God’s Hands are the only Hands truly capable of ‘holding us together,’ and ‘keeping us from falling apart.’ when seasons of struggle or life-altering circumstances descend upon us.

One of the greatest life-lessons God has taught me through my own personal encounters with blindness, and all the other unimaginable traumas that followed concerning my right eye, is that God Himself is our life’s Shield, wrapped-around all of our life’s broken pieces.  He’s the Ever-Present Help our spirits cry out for in our deepest, darkest times of need. Never will He ever fail to supply us with the abundant Grace needed to empower our hearts to keep moving forward and keep following our God…even when He’s leading us on a journey through the desert… to unknown places. Keep holding onto Him…knowing without a doubt…He’s Holding onto you. He is the Ever-Present Shield surrounding us in life; giving us the hope that the eyes of our frail hearts need to see more clearly: “ALL things really do HOLD TOGETHER IN HIM” (Colossians 1:17).

Oh Lord…You are the One Who Heals our blindness in this life. You are also our Greatest Remedy for the loss of vision and darkness that continues to plague our world, when it comes to seeing the Truth and Glory of Your Presence all around us.  You remain Faithful to Care for your children even in all our darkness; never leaving us to journey alone in the desert places we are called to face in this life. Please… Pour Your Light into our deepest darkness. Give us peace where worry and brokenness prevail. Allow us joy even though pain overtakes us. Grant us Your Strength to endure and grow from every journey You pre-destined us to walk beside You on, even in desert places. “You alone, Lord… are our Radiant Hope, and we trust in You with all of our heart. May “Your Wraparound Presence (Shield) will Strengthen us” (Ps. 33:20 TPT). 
“When we live our lives in the Shadow of God Most High, our Secret Hiding Place, we will always be shielded from harm.”
(Psalm 91:9 TPT)

In Jesus Name we pray, AMEN.